Dear Alfred.

Dear Alfred,
Almost 7 years ago, I made a foolish choice that forever changed my life for the better. I brought you home with me--and by home I mean the basement of 86 New Brighton Rd. I don't think my roomates were thrilled at the thought of a furry beast living with us, but for the first time maybe in my whole life, i didn't care what anyone thought. I wanted you.
When I saw you I just knew you were supposed to me mine. I'll never forget bringing you home, wrapped up in a old towel. You were shaking and whimpering until I brought you downstairs. You just stood there for a few minutes, unsure of what to do. I'm pretty sure you peed on the carpet.
You became my best friend pretty fast, Alfie. You were named after Alfred Topel, resident of Island Shores Retirement Home. I loved him because he was ever kind and friendly--always joyful. You lived up to his name. You loved to play--although you never did quite get the hang out fetch. Unless of course it was with "squeaky". You sure loved squeaky.
You always seemed to know when I needed some extra love. When you were still a puppy you laid on my chest and licked up all my salty heartbroken tears. I swear you knew what I was feeling. You became quite the therapy dog for me--I would tell you all my worries and fears--and you'd sit there, your big brown eyes looking right into mine. You were the only thing that got me out of bed some days Alfred. Even at my most depressed, you could make me smile.
You lived a dogs dream. Free roam in the country. I watched you and my dad slowly become friends. At first, I asked him if he loved you. He said he didn't think people could love animals. Alfie, when he told me you were gone, I've never seen him so sad in all my life. He loved you and you helped him learn how to. You were his best buddy--you weren't the only one who looked forward to your weekly Menards trip, or filling the bird feeders together. You knew his name and would look out your window whenever I said he was coming home and would always greet him with the same response: utter joy. I will miss watching you two do your dumb tricks-dance, sit tall, over-under. I loved those shows, no matter how many times i'd seem them before. I'm sad because I don't know who will be my dad's buddy now. He loved your morning routine--he'd drink his coffee while you'd sit on his lap looking for birds. He'd call me when you'd do something weird, or sweet or naughty. He and I understood how special you were.  
I will miss all the friends we'd make because of you. Impromptu birthday party entertainment, brightening up a senior's day, or how you would gently let little people explore your mop of hair. You were a friend to everyone.
You gave my mom comfort so many times. You'd keep her pillow warm until it was time for bed. When dad told you it was "time to wake up ann" you'd dutifully climb the stairs and give her a kiss. She's going to miss that wake up call. She'll miss you sitting on the sun porch with her. She'll miss you getting into her purses and stealing her mints. She'll miss your fear of your own toots. She'll miss you scratching her legs while you ride on her lap.
You helped Dee get over her fear of dogs. I'll never forget how amazed we all were when she wanted to take you for a walk. I still giggle thinking about the first time she pet you...she was so nervous and timid. The last time she saw you, you waited outside her door until i brought you in and put you in her bed. She told me to! Only you could have won your way into her heart.
Even though you pooped on Sarah's cookbooks, I saw the way she loved to have you close. She loved the way you and my dad were inseparable. You helped her too when she was sad. You'll never know how much it calmed us down, or lifted our spirits when you'd lay next to us, letting us pet your hair.
I think the moments I will miss with you the most are when you' sleep in my bed. In the middle of the night, I'd call you to me and you'd lay so close to my head, I'd often wake up with your hair in my mouth. You loved my bed because you could look right out the window to your kingdom. You'd lay there for hours with me, looking between me and the world. It was hard to get out of bed with you right there beside me. I loved knowing if you left to get breakfast, I could always count on seeing your hair sticking out from under my door. Just laying there waiting to come back in.

I've been in tears the last 3 days, knowing all these things are just memories now. I don't know what it will be like without you in our lives, fred. You were so much more to us than just a doggie. You were a life-changing gift to us all. You helped heal my broken heart, you helped conquer fears, you were a friend to the lonely and a delight to us all.  We will never forget your Alfred. Thank you for loving us all.