can't and won't

i put wilson grip tape on my prince racket. i'm a traitor.

i like tennis. i'm not good enough to not be embarrassed if i play you, but not bad enough to not be allowed to use my boyfriends $400 racket. ouch. it still stings.

i usually only like to do things that i know i am really good at. moderate ability makes me feel uncomfortable. i have sat out of many fun things because i am comme-ci comme-ci at them. what's with that? let's blame the scandinavian heritage.

i like to sing, but i won't let you hear it because 2 of my friends in high school are better than me. one time mr. oxly had every single person in choir sing a line and i thought i was going to die.  i said "i can't" when it was my turn. he asked "you cant...or you won't? i said both.


he got back at me. i don't tell a lot of people this, but he made me dress up in a puppet costume for our madrigal dinner. i had to dance around like a marionette doll while derek ledoux stood behind me on a box and was my puppeteer. all because i was the only one "small enough to fit in the costume". there is one picture of this. it is hidden in a box wayyyyyy under my bed.