since it's such a good morning, i thought i would sit on my porch. Just when i got comfortable, i heard the horrible sound that is Kent's screen door opening. 4 little paws and two 40 something feet stepped onto the porch, sun tanning oil in hand. I made it through the head and neck, but when he started rubbing his chest...i had to save my breakfast and run inside.
its ok though, because ive been really worried about skin cancer and premature wrinkles lately. enough so that ive considered making a dermatologist appointment. however, after my dentist appointment, ive reconsidered any sort of health services.
The rundown: a "hour at most" appointment turned into 2.5 hours in the chair. most of which were spent alone, with my mouth open, listening to show tunes and debating if leaving with half done dental work was safe. I have bedsores. i have sore mouth. i have solidified my theory that NOTHING GOOD EVER comes out of a dentist in a house.
on a happier note, i still haven't found the source of the awful smell in my apartment. its not constant and it seems to radiate from next to the table and stove. i moved the stove, smelt in the back to see if perhaps a rodent got electrocuted (true malmquist story), opened all the "decorative" wine bottles, everything!--NO LUCK. if you come over and find it, you win a prize.
i was driving on 94 when I stopped at those little "one car on green" stop lights. it was red, so i stopped. when i did this mean little curly haired man started honking and waving his hands at me. Naturally I made eye contact through the mirror and mouthed " I'm following the law, jack ass". I want to make it a bumper sticker. I think it would be useful for me and Meghan O. How do you make bumper stickers? How do toasters work? Why is the sky blue? Why does the brother floor hate us? Well, when i do find out how to make one, I'll ask the men at the Shout House to put it on my car...
I am going to work at a candy factory this summer. Are you laughing out loud?
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